being lost, for as long as I am, makes one lose the sensibility to love. 

eternity means nothing. life means even less. everything means nothing if I can't be yours.

in my heart, mind and soul there lays a certain sadness. 

the bitterness i taste by loving you leaves me wondering...

am i not good enough? is it that hard for someone like you to love me?

in reality, I have shown all I have to give.

it hurts. it hurts so much i can barely breathe.

i don't eat, i don't sleep.

everyday looks exactly the same for I am lost in the lines, of my poems and songs.

i tried to show you that yes, you are worthy of love.

the time spent, the things I gave and the paint of my pencils were all in vain.

yet again, I have failed myself.

I have, once again, gave someone, unworthy, all I am.

it wasn't enough. it never is.

the poems are all ruined.

my vision, blured by my tears, shows me only what could have been.

we could have helped each other grow.

if I was given the chance, I would have been your soulmate.

God must have others plans for me.

God, I now know what I don't deserve.

and, God, if by any chance, you read my poems, please show me someone who loves me.

to love as I is to suffer.

I am tired of suffering.

God... please, God, help me find my other half.

life's been hard. not just for me but for most.

this will be my last time writing about her.

because for me, this chapter is closed